Tuesday, October 7, 2008



And restricting even more tomorrow :)


Breakfast- 1/3 scoop oatmeal (100) + 1 serving mangoes (60)
Lunch- 2 green apples (64) + 1 cereal bar (140)
Dinner- 1 serving fish curry (372) + 1 serving rice (160)
Snacks- 2 slices ham + 3 slices cheese (40) + 7 jalepenos + red peppers + 1/2 fuji apple (40)


15 min treadmill (-150)
Purged dinner (-45% = -239)

Oh, score! Tomorrow, I am planning on taking out ALL my snacks and the cereal bar. This should leave a total of:

Breakfast= 160
Lunch= 64
Dinner= >600

=824 without exercising and purging.

So, WITH exercise, that should equal at least:

824 - 150=674

And if I restrict breakfast and dinner:

674 - 50 - 100 = 524.


I'm trying not to purge anymore. I know it's horribly unhealthy and I don't want to do it. Here is my motive:

I only purge when I eat too much.
Purging is unhealthy.
If I don't want to purge, I shouldn't eat as much.

Perfect motive :)

Tomorrow I'm going to buy some caffeine pills, and I'm also going to carry around some Tums with me. Yaaay.

I can do this. I am doing this. I will do this. Every day it gets better.

One problem I have: when I get hungry, I always go and eat peanut butter. Only a little at a time, but it adds up. What can I do to stop this? I know that I don't have the willpower to not. Is there any food that I can binge on that isn't fattening but tastes just as good? Anybody have any good binge food?

I'm thinking maybe raisins, or cereal? Or something of the sort.

Also, this makes me happy: 10 calorie hot chocolate that is HEALTHY for you. Yes, that's right. Okay, so it may not taste like the great, 300 calorie ones filled with cream and chocolate, but it's a good substitute and is great to drink around other people because they don't know it's actually only 10 calories instead of 500.

1 tsp of pure cocoa powder + water = hot chocolate!

Cocoa powder is full of caffeine, which helps you lose weight, and it is also surprisingly filling because it's not just water, it's water with another substance. So it keeps you pretty full.

Actually, maybe that would make a good binge food...

I haven't tried yet, but I assume that if you add some other tasty things it will be just as good as the fattening stuff. Right now it's quite bitter, but if you added some splenda, maybe a little milk, cinnamon? It might be good. And not very fattening either. Grrreat.

Also, another really great thing when you're binging: if you're a spicy food fan, add peppers to EVERYTHING! They increase your metabolism, so you don't have to feel as guilty about eating when you do binge. It's great. Today I had some slices of ham and cheese, but I added tons of peppers to it so hopefully my metabolism spiked just as I ate!

I'm so pleased with myself. I feel so happy. The only problem is, I feel full. This freaks me out. When I'm full, I just assume I ate too much.

I have to stop eating so much at home, but I can't- food is my distraction, and it is readily available.

And after I purge, I get hungry.

Hmmm...what should I do...?

PS, in response to Jane:

Thanks for your support! It really helps knowing there are people out there reading this blog, it definitely makes me more determined. Although I don't have a scale, I do think I have lost some weight...before, around my stomach I was getting a little bit pudgy. Now, however, I think I'm a little bit more toned! Before when I ate, my stomach used to go a tiny little bit outwards from the bottom of my ribcage. Now, my stomach goes a little bit inwards, and when I walk sometimes I can feel my bottom ribs poke out!

It makes me happy :) Now I just need to lose some weight on my legs...seriously, I have THUNDER THIGHS. My mom and brother tease me about my treestumpish legs. But I will do it, and I will soon achieve the beautiful twig-thin legs I have always wanted.

Just keep posting, guys, you give me determination!

Tomorrow, I'm going to try to reduced to >550. Yeah!

Starve on.


belle svelte said...


okay, some ideas for REALLY low calories snacks (these are components of my meals...). do you eat quorn meat? it's fake, but honestly...the sausages are like 50cals each. kinda hefty yes, but eat one and you'll be full for awhile. also vegies...really really low cals. like cucumber--> sprinkle salt and pepper, you have a bowl fill (like seriously) for under 25-30 cals! these you can munch on the entire day and not really feel all that guilty as they are so low cal (okay, like 9 grams is 1 calories check on measurements).

umm...what else? the sourec of your peanut butter craving is peanuts themselves. so what you COULD do is just eat like 10-12 peanuts. each peanut (unsalted, plain) is like 2 cals each.

last but not least, my absolute favorite low cal sweet: figs. it's like ambrosia for dieters. seriously, so low cal but taste so good and filling as they are very fiberous. it's best if you get them fresh/raw...but dried is great too. just boil them in water for a day =)

umm...since you live in the UK (i recently moved to the states), tesco should carry sparkling flavoured water that's really really cheap, i'm sure sainsbury's and asda carry them as well.

well anyway, i am kind of jealous that you can pull of 500 cals. i am having issues maintaing 650-700. baby steps =) i just skip breakfast now and eat a late lunch + dinner.

anyway, good luck doll. i'm sure you'll get those twiggy legs in no time!

jane said...

I have the same weakness for peanut butter. I was meaning to throw the jar out, but there is still half left. Maybe I should take the plunge and throw it in the bin while nobody is looking to eliminate temptation. I always like eating raw fruit or vegetables, but if I really want something sweet I dilute some juice with water and add about 6 cubes of ice. That way, you quench hidden thirst, satiate sugar cravings and get distracted by chewing the ice too.

hey.hana said...

Salsa is my fav binge food. The best kinds are 10 cals for 2 tablespoons, which is QUITE a lot. The next trick is to STAY AWAY FROM THE CHIPS!! Instead, put your salsa on matzoh, which is 90 cals for a HUGE piece. I just pile on the spicy goodness and eat about half the piece, for a great metabolism-stimulating snack under 100 cals.
Also, idk if they have this in the UK but morning star faux meat products rock my socks...

The best way I know to avoid binging or munching is to have a mantra of some kind. I actually have about ten, and I try to write them over and over to get them in my head. Use one like "fat thighs are the wrong size" and imagine peanut butter, yourself eating it, and your thighs whilst you write it over and over. It's a sort of self conditioning, and for me it works great b/c whenever I look at food I think "food is vile and won't make me smile" or "fragile arms can do no harm" or something of that sort and no longer want to eat.
Plus it takes up time//is a great distraction.

Something to think about...

Keep up the great work, darling!

x Hana