Tuesday, October 14, 2008

14/10/08

Although today went horribly, I'm not letting myself be unhappy.

Total calorie count= 1107

Yeah, I know. Waaaaay too much. But, you know what? I'm being positive. I'm not allowing myself to dwell on this. I'm going to stay positive. I'll do better tomorrow, and that will be great, so I'll be even more happy.

One thing that is annoying me, however...WHY THE HELL DOES D KEEP TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT ME!?

Okay, overexaggeration...he told Z and B to make sure I ate loads of pizza on Friday, and today when Z came in again he started questionning me about how much I'm eating and when he saw my lunch told me, 'that wouldn't even be enough for a fly.' I think he knows something's up, but I'm banking on him forgetting because we go to different schools and are not very close.

Still, that's not the point. I know D thinks he is helping me, but it really doesn't help to eat more. This is what Dan thinks:

not eating = bad
eating = good
not eating + eating more = good

Because I just love doing equations :)

He doesn't understand at all. And I don't blame him. I just hope he doesn't keep on advertising to people that I have an ED.

Apart from that, I feel quite...content. A little bit worried, and anxious, and unstable, but otherwise quite content.

I have friends that adore me, and it's not only the ones I've mentioned previously. I've made absolutely tons of new friends at college, I'm doing pretty well in my classes and I'm...happy.

This doesn't need to control my life. This can improve my life.

I hope it keeps on going well :)

Wish me luck! Loving the comments!

xz

1 comment:

Ana-matronic said...

Stay positive! I know the set-back days can be SO rough and its really discouraging, but you can always do better tomorrow. I know when I have a bad day I beat myself up about it and that just makes me want to binge. Butt 1107 is still about half the "normal" recommended daily intake. Just keep trying and you'll get there =)
xoxo