1/9/08

Right! Did a lot better today, as planned ;) so I'm feeling quite pleased with myself. However, am feeling quite stressed from general life. Am very annoyed at my boyfriend because he was quite (albeit unintentionally) rude, and my brother and my mother have made my anger and insecurities flare by continuously telling me how bad it was of him to be so rude. What happened was his friend was going to near where I lived to pick up a game that was for some reason linked to me, and when his friend asked him if he wanted to come along so he could see me he said he couldn't be bothered, would rather go to the airport and didn't have enough money to come. (which is a lie) I found out from his friend, and predictably was quite annoyed and texted him rather tersely saying I couldn't believe he has said to his friend he would rather see planes than me, and he replied tersely back that he was seeing me after college tomorrow. (even though he hadn't actually informed me of this, he had just said he was going to see me sometime after he started this week) Tbh, it wasn't intentional, but I do feel that he is getting- nay, is- quite lazy and already slipped into the routine of our relationship. He's starting school tomorrow, and I would have liked to think he would like to see me before he starts school again, but evidently not. I know he thinks that I'm being unreasonable, and I do understand his point of view, but still! Even if you think that, don't say it to your friend, and planning on seeing me the next day is not an excuse. Well...that does sound a bit unreasonable, actually. Obviously I don't want to spend every second of my life with him, and neither does he, but I would rather he not tell his friend and I still do want him to come see me if he has the opportunity. Grr. How annoying. Also, my family has been annoying me increasingly over the past few weeks, so much so I almost can't take it. The way I deal with it is by being extremely polite and bland so I don't have to actually engage in any possibly problematic conversations. Argh. I need to go out more, but I have no money. And I've been out every day for almost, if not the entire whole last week. Wow, this entire post is pure teenage angst. Anyway...

Breakfast- 1/2 scoop oatmeal + 2 servings mangoes + cinnamon + honey

Lunch- 1 bowl yogurt + honey + cereal clumps + one pear + one banana + cinnamon

Dinner- one bowl rice + one mackarel slice with chilli, lime and ginger seasoning + one serving vegetables

Snacks- one serving nuts + part of a baugette with a little cheese

Exercise- one mile before breakfast, one mile after lunch, ran 1.5 miles before dinner

Drinks- I think about 4.5 glasses of water so far, but will be more by the time I go to bed! Will make it 8. Also, one glass of tea.

Now that I read it, it doesn't sound very good :( I don't know why, but I'm in a determindly cheerful mood about my exercise and food issues. It's probably because it's the first day of September and I really want to do well on my diet, so I just think I am. Also, I am really quite distressed about what happened today with my bf, as now he is angry at me and I am hurt and angry with him and he's starting school tomorrow! Argh! Why does everything always have to be SO stressful!? Definitely need to do better tomorrow!