I don't really see the point of writing my height and weight, as my height isn't changing and I don't have a scale so I can't see whether I've gained/lost any weight. Ah well. Maybe I'll find a cheap one somewhere, as I have no money. Anyway, today was pretty good, better than normal! But that's not saying much. I did more exercise, but I'm still eating way too many snacks. Plan- exercise more, cut out all but three meals a day, then reduce the amount of food in those meals, then cut out lunch, then reduce the amount of food again, etc. Soon I'll be starting school again, which will either help me or hinder me enormously.
Positives of going to school:
- back on schedule, so don't have enough time to snack
- there is a gym at the school, so I can exercise more
- have free time to exercise
- may feel obligated to exercise with my friends
Negatives of going to school:
- may feel obligated to snack more with my friends
- may not have enough time to exercise
- may eat more unhealthy because there isn't enough choice of food
- may eat more because I am stressed
- may not be able to implement my dieting techniques during school
I think going to school may help me in terms of eating less; however, I think that my restricting schedule will certainly not help me in terms of exercising more. Ah well, there's nothing I can do about it anyway- I'm looking forward to starting school and being on schedule, as right now I'm being rather lazy with all this free time, and I can hardly not go just because I'll be more unhealthy.
Anyway, back to my day...met up with my friend and went swimming for about an hour, then ran into some other friends and we went to costa. To start with I was good, but then I got hungry and split this long chocolate pastry with my friend which must have been quite fattening! I'm really having a hard time giving up snacking; before I would eat three small meals and be able to stop myself through willpower alone. Now I eat three large meals, and can't stop myself from snacking afterwards! ARGH! And my family does not help AT ALL, which pisses the hell out of me. I'm half Chinese, so there's enormous pressure for me to stay slender. Right now, by Western standards I'm very slim. However, by Chinese standards, I'm a size large! 'Tis quite unfair, especially as I look more White than Asian. All the time my brother and especially my mother call me fat, which is really a blow to my self-esteem. For example, today, after I had some crumbs of a donut which barely even counts as anything, my mom said, "You know, I always see you eating. No wonder you're so fat. You're such a pig." They say it's harmless joking, but don't you think it's a bit insensitive to someone who wants to lose weight? Just a little. Certainly one good thing about going to school is to get out of the house. That will certainly be a relief.
Breakfast- 1/3 cup oatmeal + one serving rasberries + one serving mangoes + some cinnamon and honey
Lunch- one large salad + lots of dressing; salad cream, olive oil and balsalmic vinegar + some spicy chicken (probably quite calorically dense)
Dinner- one bowl rice + lots of fish + 2 if not 3 servings spicy spinach with coconut milk and garlic
Snacks- 1/2 stick chocolate pastry + one nectarine + 2 digestives
Exercise- regular morning stretches, swimming for between 30 min and an hour, did 1.5 miles, running. .25 at the end, and am going to do my regular exercises and evening stretches soon.
I feel absolutely sick when I reread what I've just written. I have to get more discipline, without question. How can I let myself go so abominably? Already this blog is helping me a little bit, but I feel so depressed when I look at it. Well, if I want to stop feeling depressed, I'll just have to start being more healthy! Here's my plan for tomorrow:
Breakfast- am going to break routine and finish off the cereal. I know it's not the healthiest option, but there's not that much left, so I'll eat that as well as some extra fruit. I'll eat my oatbran and fruit as normal though after tomorrow.
Lunch- have also been craving yougurt, but because it's so calorically dense I haven't been eating it for desert like I want. Instead I'll start eating it for lunch. Usually, I have the non-flavoured yougurt + wheatbran (very healthy, very dense) + loads of fruit, usually 2-4 servings of different types (also very healthy, also quite a lot of calories) + honey (supposedly healthy) + cinnamon + digestives (can't resist) I'm going to start eating yougurt for lunch because it is extremely healthy, very filling, sates my craving for it and stops me from eating other, more unhealthy food. I didn't want to eat it for desert because it's so much in the evening, but as lunch it's great as I burn calories during the day and it is very healthy and energy boosting. Perfect!
Dinner- whatever's cooking, but I'm going to start eating the vegetables first, meat second and carbs last. I also know this works brilliantly, as I had been doing this routine for a while in the US and the veggies are amazingly filling.
Desert- fruit, nuts, maybe sometimes fish, colecuts, cheese and crackers when we have it, which is not often. Nothing fattening.
By the end of the day, I'll have eaten at least 5 servings of fruit and veggies which of course is extremely healthy. I'll have also eaten lots of fibre from my first meal, and lots of other stuff from the yougurt. Dinner is pretty much always healthy as well, so I'll be eating very healthy from now on! If I do this and keep up my exercise, I should be doing a lot better than now. I also have some other tricks up my sleeve:
- Every morning I'm going to drink a cocoa, coffee, cinnamon and honey mix. Cocoa is apparently very good for you as it has a lot of magnesium, which is a mood-lifter (great in the mornings!) and helps with heart disease and improves digestion, not to mention the caffeine. Coffee is also very good for you, as it contains caffeine, has many antioxidants which help slow down the aging process which means better skin and improves endurance apparently. It's only a tsp each of coffee and cocoa, so I should be dandy :) The cinnamon and honey mix supposedly is most effective first thing in the morning, is filling, helps keep fat from accumulating in the body and helps keep the skin soft and fresh :D So, altogether, 1 tsp each of cocoa, coffee and cinnamon and 2tsps of honey.
- I also need to drink more juice. My brother loves cranberry juice, so I am going to start drinking it too. Apparently it helps get rid of fat and, as it is tart, surpresses your appetite.
- I need more calcium, so in addition to my yogurt I am going to start drinking a glass of soy milk every day, probably before I eat. Calcium helps lose weight, as not eating enough calcium makes the body think it is in starvation mode. I don't eat that much calcium because I don't want to get more cellulite (I only have a little- exercise definitely helps get rid of it!) so drinking soy milk and yogurt is a good idea.
- I've started adding cinnamon and peppers to a lot of my food. Cinnamon helps keep off the weight, as I wrote about above, and peppers also discourage weight gain. Cooooool.
- I'll also start recording how much lemon water and green tea I eat. Lemon water also helps lose weight, and green tea also aids digestion.
I'd probably write more about other dieting methods I'm planning to use, but I'm awfully as tired as it's 5 to midnight here. Anyway, after writing this I'm feeling a lot more positive! Wish me luck! ;)